So, I finally got a chance to be assessed and at least get some answers in regards to my mental health. I AM BROKEN! Seriously though, I have been battling with my mental health for quite a long time. Always felt…..wrong. Now I just have names/classifications but no real answers as to how to deal.

In the past I have been told that I had different things and for different reasons:

1. Depression
2. Anxiety
3. ADHD
4. I have anxiety and depression because of the ADHD
5. I only have Anxiety
6. Actually diagnosed with ADHD by a specialist
7. Borderline Personality Disorder

Now my diagnosis is as follows:

1. ADHD
2. General Anxiety Disorder
3. Social Anxiety Disorder
4. Panic Disorder
5. Borderline Personality Traits

What does this mean? Not a lot really. I knew I had ADHD and anxiety. This isn’t really telling me why I think the way I do or feel the way I do. Maybe the new meds will start to help me and I am going to therapy so over time I my no longer feel the way I feel. Like something is wrong with me.

Do you know what it is like to often feel like you have something not quite right with you but you don’t know what? To question if your thought process is correct or your reactions to situations are like other peoples? I often look at people going about their daily lives looking happy and wonder why life seems so difficult for me but not for them. I can only hope that these kinds of thoughts dissipate as time goes by. I just want to feel like I am not broken or damaged.

Anyhoo, that is my rant for the day. Until next time-stay sane.